Pain II(r1판 RAW)

[[분류:수필]]
Oh, pain! Thy has dragged me into the darkest, deepest part of your inner soul. I compulsorily traced thee trace, reverse to my own vision and against and opposing to my will. I was cramped under thy weight burdening my own soul, causing me to sink deeper and deeper down the crust of doom, finally encountering overwhelmers to have me unconscious. I have begged, appealed to cease these leading to my ultimate; still have I been ignored wholly by your careless own. If thought, that is controlling my body to action, you were controlling my thoughts to initiate my body to your purpose.

Oh, for the sake of god, that I do not believe, you may instantly discontinue this misfortune that I recently encountered! As the pain is too mighty for me to handle, as I struggle to survive, resist, and endure, idiosyncratically I am beginning to deep down to the swamp of never-ending nightmares that come to face me every dawn, however I would never be able to efface that memory off my brain.

O mighty pain, do not let me be the floccinaucinihilipilification of thee, as present is already drowning out my blood out of my veins
and ideality out of my head. I never intended to be your nemesis, as I have always lived with your own self and knew you were necessary for the useless me. But, now, pray leave me alone.

This overwhelming pain has already cut into my skin and reaching for my inner... oh, it has saturated me with despair! oh despair – despair that makes me desperate to crawl out of this flooding pain. and then it would come — the drought — the drought of my feelingness and emotions and memory – all merged into a large group of negativity — which does nothing to me but to kill, murder, and crush me ’till my death.

Pain bruised and tore up my skin, exposing unprotected insides of me, and enjoyed it. Thy joy shuddered the meaningless world and crumbled; then broke my bones and powdered what was left of me. Blood splattered on either side of thee, yet you lacked conscience because it didn't exist in your science; Then you maintained your pain upon me and still intensifying, and at last the degree reached its maximum;

I came to face the ultimate end that was waiting for me from the start — starting me every time you come to meet me, keeping me alive although I wanted death, however, making me conceive the pain equilibrium of grasping into the area of death, between the boundaries of life and death. I was weavered by own yourself.

If thy do not decide the end of this ongoing pain upon me, I shall finally fall off the cliff of life, into the descent of madness, which I am already seeming to suffer in concurrent realm, simultaneously desperately wanting, oh craving for escaping this roundabout that never seems to end, so that, I express my willingness to you, whom does not seem to fancy the idea of mine.

There, I would want to break the eternal cycle of upturning wheel of pains of life, but as I am nearing the area of death, that is, the end of life, due to you causing me to, adjoining my side with the demon beside; I have crashed into the walls of fate, shattering my soul and body, yet without nourishment at all.

God, but the cycle, however, grasped by the outer shell of itself, has been reinforced more and more; by the saint of the heaven, I do concurrently lack the strength to shatter the shell, I even cannot keep up with just obtaining every seconds of my demolished life, course so that the detaining power that lock me down would not ever seem to allow me penetrate.

When could it ever end? Perhaps not until reconsideration of the death, which shall never be good. O misfortune! Why, may I ask, oh why have you selected me to be your victim after all? Where could you have ever derived from? That mischief! 'lways in my way and causing me misconceptions and misleading to miscommunications of the 'ntire world!

Now I see darkness booning 'front of my 'wn eyes, dancing and propagating. It has swallowed my entire eyes, my eyesight citing nothin', and then comes the flame, flaming 'ain that let me foresee the near future right next to me. 'ain that constrained me and 'onfined me so that I could not move any 'art of my body, pain. 'ain, end this, or... 'r...